The Cubicle-Industrial Complex

On leaving my 9 to 5 and being unemployed for the foreseeable future

Above is my view, Monday through Friday, roughly 8:30 AM to 4:30 PM (although I tend to leave early). I work at a consulting firm in Omaha, NE, which is not necessarily what I had in mind when I graduated with a B.A in environmental science and a minor in sociology. I have been working here for roughly six monotonous months now and even though I am one of the firm’s most recent hires, I put in my two weeks last Wednesday.

When I work in the office, my day goes as follows; I get in my car, hop on the expressway for roughly 15 to 20 minutes, park, go into my office, grab a cup of coffee, and sit. Maybe it’s the fact that I went through a global pandemic while in college, or the fact that my attention span is equivalent to a squirrel’s, but when I sit and stare at my dual monitors, it feels as if a part of me is eroding away. I am becoming the monitor.

Am I being dramatic or is this truly a demoralizing way to live? I call this way of life the “Cubicle Industrial Complex” because from my 22-year-old point of view, it appears to me that it is easier to fall into this lifestyle than to do anything else. I do not blame my co-workers for complying to this cubicle purgatory because it is safe, if they have kids or a mortgage to pay off, there is always going to be financial security.

However, does financial security even matter if you dedicate the majority of your life to this cubicle? I have only been here for less than half a year, but I feel so incredibly old. My eye bags have gotten worse, I pick at my skin to pass the time, my butt is staring to feel squishy. I had to get new contact lenses because staring at a screen for 8+ hours a day does not improve your eyesight by any means. I have had to go up on my antidepressants, I have had to cancel plans because I am worried I will not get enough sleep before work, I had to get a therapist (which I should have regardless of work).

When I expressed these concerns to my boss, she told me that she too has to take antidepressants and go to therapy too, however, she will do whatever it takes to “get the job done”. When I heard those words my stomach dropped. I DON’T WANT TO GET THE JOB DONE IF IT IS KILLING ME!

I just want to know why American society led to this (answer: capitalism). I get ten personal days a year and ten sick days. Even if I had the funds from my job to take a trip to Europe for a month, I could not do that because I am bonded to my cubicle, she’s very needy.

I hope this post does not come off as entitled, I understand that and office job is not the worst job to have, I mean I could be a SHEIN garment worker…. I just feel like I have been lied to, I am wasting my life, I do not feel like myself right now, but I don’t even know who she is.

I am thankful that I had the courage to put in my two-weeks, yet I am terrified that I will wind up in the exact same position, just at a different cubicle this time. This lifestyle has to be escapable, right? I always envy those who can make a living off of writing, podcasting, youtubing, etc. Unfortunately for the majority of the world, that specific lifestyle appears to be unattainable, and does it actually increase societal value?

I guess sitting in a cubicle all day does not increase societal value either… and at the end of the day we are on a floating rock in an infinite universe so why would I spend this beautiful chance I have to live the human experience inside a cubicle decorated in different shades of gray? Anyways, I should probably get back to work.